Legal Theft Project: And Adventure Makes Three

“You are the reason we have been banned in four countries.”

“Two countries and two island nations. The last two don’t really count. They barely had land to hold their port in place.”

“The important word is ‘banned’. As in, ‘we cannot go there and do anything because they now want to shoot us – or at least overcharge us horrendously for any and all things.”

“Which is of course the greater of the two sins.”

“Of course. People always want to shoot us. But they aren’t usually secure enough either in the eyes of the law or their own power to get away with it. Now they are – which means my usual tactic of intimidating people to give me what I want is going to be significantly less effective.”

Brin and Micka froze as the sounds of armored feet clanked up nearby stairs. As they waited for whatever commotion was occurring on the other side of the parapet to cease they  became very aware of how far they had to fall if they slipped. The foot of the castle wall was at the top of a steep embankment which fell out onto the royal road below where a squad of cavalry went riding by. The guards on the wall moved on and after a few moments, so did Brin and Micka.

“I can always try charm…”

Brin gritted her teeth and glared at the wall as she couldn’t turn to look at Micka. “Banned. In. Four. Countries.”

“My charm is not banned.”

“No, I suppose you could always stand on the other side of the border and talk them to death.”

“Come on Brin. I thought we were having fun.”

“Oh yes, tons of fun. I adore daring escapes in the dead of night where I can possibly tumble to my death. It feeds my daring soul and is a great tale with which to acquire drinks. I am just saying that if we keep it up at this rate we are going to run out of countries in five years.”

“Maybe in five years I can convince one some of them to hate the others and pay us to spy or turn on people.”

“You are not allowed to use your charm to start an international war just to cover our own asses, Micka.”

“You sound pretty certain about that.”

“War is gross and never glamorous. I want my escapes and tales glamorous and with moments of comfort, and with less mud.”

“Fair enough. Brin?”

“Yes Micka?”

“Where are we going?”

“At some point we are going to go back over the wall, then we are going down the wall and through a door. Once we are through the door we will go through other doors, avoiding people, until we cannot avoid people, you will use your charm, I will use my quick wits, and then we are going to run so fast an eight-legged horse couldn’t catch us.”

“Okay. Can I swing on a chandelier?”

“Provided no one has crossbows and a chandelier is present, be my guest.”

“I love my life.”

“Heaven help me, so do I.”


Thieves! Look at what the wonderful ring of thieves have written with this first line.

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